Couch Parenting

My dad parented from the couch. It's a long, lost art.  No parent can do that anymore. The way you parented from a couch is by leveraging fear.  No one does that in these times. Society is "Pussified", in my opinion. Everyone wants to be coddled; Everyone wants to win.  That's not how life works. My dad did it from the couch. You knew if he had to get off of the couch, you messed up. The flip side is that he hardly ever removed himself from that place once he arrived. The fear of him getting up was much more concerning than him actually making the effort to do so. At the end of the day, Mom raised us, but Dad gave us our "Street Smarts", and we never had to live on the streets.

I wish I could say it was the best Thanksgiving ever.  It was not.  I spent the majority of the time thinking about my dad.  It wasn't even that he made Thanksgiving great.  My mom did that part.  It was always the phone calls or him answering the phone with "Happy Thanksgiving".  It took all I had in me to call my mom this year because I knew dad wasn't going to answer the phone.  It was incredible that she answered "Happy Thanksgiving", but it wasn't the same.  I know that I am going through something right now and I need to keep it together for the upcoming holidays, but it is going to be challenging.  I miss my father.

Transmissed

Most humorous thing I heard tonight: "Let's get this tranny out of here and see what's what." One of my car shows; Overhauling. However, I giggled inside hearing this said out loud. Granted, they are talking about transmissions, but I am easily amused. I'm guessing they found a shaft they weren't expecting to find. ;-) Still making myself smile typing this....47 years old....YEP. Still haven't grown up.

Handle It????

This may be true, but someone needs to clarify where the breaking point is in this statement.  I am doing my best to hold it together, but it has been a crazy 18 months.  I know no one thinks I post on here any longer, so it sometimes allows me a release of some sort.  My children's mother is not doing well right now, and I can't fix it.  I hate that more than anything in the world.  I hate not being able to fix things for the people I care about.  I feel helpless.

Game Winner!

Jaden's team was down 13-11, when Jaden hit this shot to win the game!

Connections

Come to find out, my dad used to text my girlfriend all of the time.  Most of the time is was because of a NASCAR race, but the rest of the time it was about a women's softball game on ESPN.  I'm not bothered by him texting my girlfriend, only that we couldn't have shared our love for women's softball players together.  Stacy played softball her whole life.  Clearly this must be genetic.

FiveNineteen

My sister has been taking care of my mom since dad passed and was going through the house this weekend as she was cleaning and painting.  She happened to stumble across this item.  My dad used to bowl (basically and excuse to drink during the week, just as I used to do) and somehow accumulated this collectible.  A 519 is not really a great series and I don't know why he would be given this as a trophy unless he was just on a bad team, but my birthday is 5-19-70, so this will always mean something to me.  It probably meant something to him as well.

You Never Call Anymore.......

I wish I would have called my dad more frequently.  Even when I did call to speak with him, he always said "Hello.  How are you?  Here is your mom."  I'm not sure if he didn't want to speak with me or if he just wanted to ensure that I spoke with my mother since my calls were neither regular nor anticipated.  When I visited my father in the hospital he had just been placed on a machine that helped him breathe and he was never able to say a word to me.  Even though I was there soon enough to have him somewhat coherent, he was never able to verbally express anything to me.  I was able to say what I needed to say and he was able to respond to me, but I didn't have the luxury of a "Final conversation" with him.  That will follow me forever.  I feel even more pain for my brother, Brandon.  He didn't even get the opportunity to see dad somewhat lucid and converse with him.  Phone calls are free, make them when you can.  

TDab's World

I have SO many feelings when I see your face.  Some are great, some are less than stellar and some are indifferent.  I love you wholeheartedly.  I will miss you indefinitely.  You taught me more than I will ever realize or be able to acknowledge.  You made people laugh and smile, and to me that is what makes life bearable.  I love you.  I have hated you.  I want to be just like you.  I want you to be here.  I miss you.  You touched a lot of people with your sense of humor and wit.  I hope when I am no longer around I will be appreciated as much as I appreciate and love you.  I look forward so seeing you again, just not too soon.  ;-)

This one has always moved me.......Even more now.

This is me talking to the majority of people I care about. Michael Crabtree talking to Amari Cooper. Crabtree probably realizes where he made mistakes early on and is trying to help Cooper not make the same. Cooper probably thinks Crab is just being an asshole, but he is just trying to impart knowledge so Coop can become a better person sooner in life than he.  Anytime I have been an asshole to any of those close to me is to help make them a better person or to have them take a different perspective on a situation. Sometimes when someone is in your face, it isn't necessarily to demean you, it's to help prepare you for life and make you a better contributor to society.